I've had some hard times emotionally over the last few weeks. In part, I'm weary of the journey. In part, the medicines didn't agree with me. BUT GOD.
God is so faithful. In my distress, He prompted me to reach out to the right people —good friends who knew how to help. He also brought me in contact with a couple of local support groups, and with an acquaintance who is going through her own breast cancer journey in my own home town. She'll be starting radiation a week or two before I do. Neither of us is looking forward to it, but it will be good for it to be over. We have become fast friends.
For a number of years, she prepared income taxes for people. She said that every year, March 15th would come, and she would just become so tired and worn out. She just wanted it over with. Tax season is exhausting. It wasn't until the last couple of years doing taxes that she recognized the pattern. She said that she is going through the same emotions now. She's finished her surgery and chemo, and now, right before the final push for her, she is just exhausted physically and emotionally.
I'm feeling the same way. My chemo and surgery are now complete. I'm healing from the surgery, but have had some trouble with one of the incisions. I had it checked today, and I don't need any stitches, but it will need some extra tlc for awhile. I'm so ready to be done. I still have radiation to do. I'd hoped to finish by the end of the year so I wouldn't have to pay a new deductible, but it doesn't look like that's possible now. I've also got another six or eight months of IV therapy to block the hormones that fed my cancer. Then there will be pills. But that will seem much easier
It helped to recognize the feelings for what they are. Exhaustion from the journey paired with normal emotions from having a life-threatening illness and normal day-to-day life problems. Life does go on you know. It didn't stop for cancer.
Thanks be to Dr. Baker, Dr. Anis, and Dr. Hughes and mostly to thanks to God, my life won't stop for cancer either.
So, now I'll continue pressing through.
God bless you all!
Thank you all your prayers and encouragement through this time.
Please pray for my husband and children, too. It's wearing on all of us, and the holidays are fast approaching. Thank you!
I will trust the LORD at all times. HE'S GOOD!