Tuesday, February 8, 2011

When Hubby is Unemployed or Underemployed....

"And let us not be weary in well doing: 
for in due season we shall reap,
if we faint not."
~Galations 6:9

Having a husband who was unemployed and then underemployed brought many challenges to my life; but, none has been so challenging as the problem of whether I should seek employment.  I've been a homemaker for twenty years now.  I quit my job to stay home when my first child was born.  Our pastor told us that we needed to do what we believed God was telling us to do.  So, even though I was then making more money than my husband, we made the decision for me to stay home to raise Matthew.  It was hard in a lot of ways; but, we stuck with it.  Eventually, the Lord lead me to homeschool Matthew as well.  Fast forward....three more kids....Hubby has a great job....Hubby loses great job....starts business....business fails....series of less than profitable jobs after a period of unemployment....

During this time, one of my hardest struggles has been with whether I should get a job.  I have a college education which my dad was wonderful to finance for me.  I kept thinking that if Hubby wasn't making money; I should.  The problem was that I didn't feel I had God's or Hubby's blessing to leave the children to work.  In fact, Hubby was against it.  Every time I started looking for work, the tension level in me and in my family skyrocketed.  When I stopped looking, everything calmed down again.  Even after months of looking on and off, nothing came up.  I had a few interviews early on; but, even though I could have done the work easily, nothing came of it. 

Meanwhile, my husband was still telling me not to work.  I have four kids, a house, and homeschooling to do.  Finally, I realized that I needed to trust God and trust my husband and do with what I have.  I released the worry, though not without grabbing it up once in awhile.  I am doing what God has given me to do.  Hubby is doing what God has given him to do.  We're trusting God for the rest.  God has taken care of us miraculously at times.  We've been disappointed at times.  But, I've learned to appreciate the small things in life.  Like I told my friend, I always have a ball of yarn when I need it.  That may seem small; but, a few dollars for yarn is a luxury.  God has given me some of those little things. 

So, if you're in a tough situation, seek God.  Listen.  Be still.  Try to calm your nerves and trust what your husband and your God are telling you.  Walk in faith.  Look for the little blessings.  Focus on the good.  You can do this.  In Christ's strength, you can do this.


God bless you, keep you, and encourage you all,
Laura
Content and blessed at home

P.S. I wrote this a few years ago when my husband was unemployed. He's unemployed again. The same questions have gone through my mind. I asked God. I asked my husband. Now I'm waiting on the Lord and staying home with my family and taking care of them until my husband or my God asks me to do otherwise. Laura 2/21/16

Update 4/14/16 My husband found a job and has been working almost two weeks. In just over a week, we will receive the first paycheck. It's been four months since my husband closed his business. No unemployment benefits, no food stamps, but somehow, someway, God has taken care of us through it all. Don't give up!




~~~~~
May I suggest?


23 comments:

  1. Excellent article, Laura! And, yes, AMEN! We've been through a lot of those tough times ourselves and, as with you all, working outside of the home has never been an option. When the thought of getting a job or trying to do something outside of the home has come up it has always ended in stress and strain on the entire household. The Lord has always provided for us, sometimes miraculously, always above and beyond anything that we can imagine. It's wonderful to look back and see how far He has brought us and we look forward to the future with hope and confidence that He will finish the work that He has begun in us. God bless you, my dear sister!

    All My Love,
    ~Rebecca

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  2. Thank you so much for this!!

    My husband and I are relocating to a small town in Texas, where we believe God is leading us....

    My husband is always happiest when I am home (I am a freelance writer) and I love being able to fulfill all my duties as a homemaker and a wife. I believe my primary job is here, and that my secondary job of writing, is a means to a creative outlook while generating a little bit of money.

    I look forward to gardening and growing our own food in Texas, as well as furthering my knowledge of homemaking. God is always in control, and thank you for the encouragement.

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  3. Hi Laura!

    Thank you so much for blogging this wonderful post today! It is so important to seek advise from the One that knows our hearts better than anyone! Staying home is always the best option, and it can work, if you include the Lord in your plans! Thank you again, for the gentle reminder to turn our troubles to Him.

    Hugs,
    Barb

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  4. Once again, thank you for this post. It is so encouraging to know that there are other Christians who actually believe the same way I do. I've been reading in James the past couple of weeks and I really love the part in chapter 1 that tells us to ask God for wisdom, but to not doubt. God's wisdom seems foolish to man and so to tell people that I'm not looking for a job, even if it would be easier for me to get one is foolish to them. But I can see how God is blessing us for this decision and you are right, the tension level is so much less when I am following Him and not myself. :D

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  5. Wonderful words of wisdom. Be blessed that your husband wants you at home, that in itself is so important. Some husbands want their wives out earning money, and that just adds to the stress of the situation. May the Lord continue to encourage and strengthen you as you choose to follow Him. xx

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  6. Just read these words today and was blessed.
    Cathy S.

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  7. Thank you for your words....I believe that it was God who directed me to find your blog today and now I feel so much better...thank you!!!!

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  8. As my husband builds a business, I recently, under his encouragement, took my first full time job since our marriage (I used to teach 2 days a week at the university) - and it has challenged me - yet for now God says that's where He wants me - and where my husband wants me. Sometimes the challenge is letting others lead - I miss the homemaking, the details, the time to think long thoughts! Your message so encouraged me, even though the calling is different:)

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  9. Thank you so much for sharing your story Laura. My little one is about to start K this year leaving me with enough free time to get at least a part time job somewhere, but where when I've been at the house for all these years...I can understand exactly what you are going through...and love your advice too. Trust Him and Listen to Him with your heart. Looking forward to another one of your post to be shared at the Fluster Buster party, till then have a great week, Lizy, your party co host!

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  10. I think I needed this...thank you. My husband and I both work but we are STRUGGLING! We're both underpaid but especially my husband. We have rent and student loans on top of all the other regular bills and I feel like we're barely keeping our head above water. It's absolutely depressing that we have nothing to show in the way of savings in the year and a half we've been married. I recently read a blog about moving into an RV for a year or so to save money but even that isn't an option. I have a plan that could save us an extreme amount of money but it involves moving in with my parents for about a year or so. Yikes. It's the only option I can come up with that will save us enough money that we can buy a house before we're 40! We're only 25 but want to buy a house so bad. Renting is horrible! Anyways, thanks for this post. I know I need to chill out and trust God but MAN is that hard sometimes!

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  11. Hi Lizbeth,

    You're very welcome. Sometimes it's hard to be transparent on the internet; but, I think we need truth not just glossy happy happy articles.

    This is a post that I wrote back in 2011. I felt that it was still a timely message for many. It's good for me to remember as well when the money doesn't go quite as far as I wish it would.

    My husband has been steadily employed now for over two years. It's so good to have money coming in regularly. Thank you for your kindness to me.

    Have a wonderful week!
    Laura

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  12. Dear Catherine,

    Please do not despair. We still struggle after many years, but GOD is good. I advise you to pray pray pray over any money you spend. If your husband is willing, ask the LORD together for fresh revelation about how and where you can lower your costs and increase your income.

    Ask Him. He loves you and He's looking out for you. Your Father God and His Son Jesus Christ own the cattle on a thousand hills. I've been known to ask Him to sell one for me. ~smile~

    Please check out my thrifty posts for a few sometimes unconventional ideas for saving money.


    "Father God, I ask in the Name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, that you draw Catherine and her husband close to you. I ask that you reveal your Truth and your Plan for their life together. Bind them together with a cord that cannot be broken.

    Bless them in their life physically, financially, spiritually, and relationally.
    In Jesus' Name, Amen."

    Bless you dear one!



    Laura
    Lane

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  13. I am always blessed as I read down through the posts shared on my blog's WholeHearted Wednesday!! My husband hasn't lost his job (he did 18 years ago) but this post for another reason was totally what I needed to read right now. I copied the last paragraph down for tomorrow. Thank you so much!! Keep looking to Jesus and He will provide for you as He has for us.

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  14. Bless you Judith!

    May God bring the hope, encouragement, and provision you need in every season, in Jesus' Name I ask it.

    Have a terrific week!
    Laura

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  15. Great advice - we faced this also and it is good to KNOW that God is in control in such a situation....it is just too easy for us women to take charge and get ahead of the Lord. Thank you for posting this. :) Gentle Joy

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  16. You are so right, Joy. I'm in a situation right now where I want to do that. I'm praying instead.

    Blessings,

    Laura

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  17. If God wants you to work, a job will come and it will all work out for you, your family and the household. My job doesn't go smoothly because of me, rather God. I'm not exhausted after work because God makes sure I dont. I trust in the Lord and He gave me a wonderful job .

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  18. So encouraging! Your situation was similar to my current sutuation. I needed to be reminded that God provdes when we are being obedient.

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  19. Hi Country Girl,
    My husband's restaurant is closed for the season. We've had no income for a couple of months. It's getting pretty tight. I understand. May God bring the employment and provision your family needs as you trust in Him. HE loves you. HE will never leave you nor forsake you. I pray that you will feel that love. HE is your security. In Jesus' Name.
    Blessings to you. It's really good to hear from you.
    Laura

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  20. Thank you for your encouraging words.
    Laurie

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Be blessed!
Laura